Olah ^_^ I'm happy to say that this would really be the start of something new :)
Today is the end of November 2011 and as this day ends, all those painful feelings (hopefully) would also end. I am happy to share to you that last November 27,2011 we had our Reunion (father's side) and I'm very happy that time because we have gathered and those conflicts and quarrels our family and relatives had are fixed and as I saw their smiles, their laugh and felt the presence of PEACE, I felt overjoyed. It's really nice to see your loved ones happy. :) That was really the happiest day of my life. It's like the one that I asked for a long time to God had already been answered. It's like History repeats itself. Even though there are changes but the joy or happiness that i felt before repeated. And you know what I really like the most? Because before that reunion happened, I am very sad. I felt really down and I felt grief. God is really Good at timing, not only at timing but also at everything! It is indeed true that there is always a rainbow after a rain and it is really true that God answers our prayers at the best time we just have to wait. Anyways, i forgot to tell you the reason why i'm really down or sad before that reunion happened.
Well, as usual, the reason that i felt very sad is... "about that crazy little thing called INFATUATION". Have you read my post entitled "That Possibility"? well, I'm sad to say that there is no way that... "that possibility" would happened. Last Friday night, I just realized that I should stop. I even cried that time because i really realized that he will never felt the same feeling i felt for him. I prayed and asked God to help me fade that feeling so that I would be happy because to tell you honestly, i always think of the guy i like before i would go to sleep and that guy would be the first thing i had in mind after i woke up in the morning. it's the cause why i feel sad everyday because i know that... that guy don't feel the same way and the worst thing is I want to stop thinking of the guy i like but i really can't. He is really a terrible nuisance.
But I'm happy to say to all of you that after i shed tears and prayed to God. I felt comfortable. I felt joy in my heart. It's like those sadness that i felt had gone away as the tears came out of my eyes. I know that God has answered my prayers. According to Revelation 21:4 "He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, for the old order has passed away."
I know that God has a reason why He let me feel that way for a long time and it's because he wants me to learn. He wants me to be strong. He wants me to be patient and I thank God for that. God is really Good. God is really WITH ME AND US. He has a reason for everything. HE IS GOOD ALL THE TIME!
We should just trust and believe in HIM. Right now, I'm happy. With God in our hearts, ALL IS WELL :) AMEN!
that would be all :D
-k2i6e6.kaimen-
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
GRIEF...
What happened today causes me to feel GREAT UNHAPPINESS...
Today I learned and i realized that I should not only decide or think for myself when it comes to groupings. I should think or ask also others opinion before i will make a decision.
Yesterday, Our teacher in ENGLISH said that we will have a debate about which one is easier. Writing or Speaking. The first thing that comes into my mind was WRITING because for me it is easier especially when we want to express or say something to a person which we cannot tell them personally because we don't have enough confidence and courage to tell it and also if a person don't have the capabilities to speak because of being mute then most probably that person will communicate through writing and for me "ALL OF US CAN SAY OR EXPRESS WHAT WE FEEL THROUGH WRITING BUT NOT ALL OF US CAN EXPRESS OR SAY WHAT WE FEEL THROUGH SPEAKING" specially the Non-verbal people. They would prefer to express what they really feel using their hands like drawing. Drawing is a written language. In ancient times, People use this what we called CUNEIFORM (written symbols) which is the first true written language to communicate. Then in our Filipino 100, I have learned that most people are afraid of SPEAKING than DYING because of being nervous and scared. Then they said that not all the people are good in Writing but for me not all people are also good in SPEAKING. Like me, I'm not really good in Speaking in front of many people specially in SPEAKING ENGLISH. But I just realized that it really depends on a person. We have different STRENGTHS and WEAKNESSES. So, I guess both is just the same. When a person can express his/her feelings and is more confident to tell it through speaking then SPEAKING is EASIER. But if a person prefers to express or say what he/she feels through WRITING then WRITING is EASIER.
I just realized that God created things FAIR.
We didn't won the debate but at least I learned something and realized something.At least we did our best and i have experienced an oxford style debate :)
That would be all.
-k2i6e6.kaimen-
Today I learned and i realized that I should not only decide or think for myself when it comes to groupings. I should think or ask also others opinion before i will make a decision.
Yesterday, Our teacher in ENGLISH said that we will have a debate about which one is easier. Writing or Speaking. The first thing that comes into my mind was WRITING because for me it is easier especially when we want to express or say something to a person which we cannot tell them personally because we don't have enough confidence and courage to tell it and also if a person don't have the capabilities to speak because of being mute then most probably that person will communicate through writing and for me "ALL OF US CAN SAY OR EXPRESS WHAT WE FEEL THROUGH WRITING BUT NOT ALL OF US CAN EXPRESS OR SAY WHAT WE FEEL THROUGH SPEAKING" specially the Non-verbal people. They would prefer to express what they really feel using their hands like drawing. Drawing is a written language. In ancient times, People use this what we called CUNEIFORM (written symbols) which is the first true written language to communicate. Then in our Filipino 100, I have learned that most people are afraid of SPEAKING than DYING because of being nervous and scared. Then they said that not all the people are good in Writing but for me not all people are also good in SPEAKING. Like me, I'm not really good in Speaking in front of many people specially in SPEAKING ENGLISH. But I just realized that it really depends on a person. We have different STRENGTHS and WEAKNESSES. So, I guess both is just the same. When a person can express his/her feelings and is more confident to tell it through speaking then SPEAKING is EASIER. But if a person prefers to express or say what he/she feels through WRITING then WRITING is EASIER.
I just realized that God created things FAIR.
We didn't won the debate but at least I learned something and realized something.At least we did our best and i have experienced an oxford style debate :)
That would be all.
-k2i6e6.kaimen-
Sunday, November 06, 2011
Someday, It will finally found me.
It's almost 12 am and i'm still awake. It's because something's bothering me. Anyways, before that I would like to say sorry for not writing here for the past few days. I'm just busy and sometimes lazy. hehe :) well to be honest, last november 1, I'm planning to write and share my another spectacular experience about celebrating halloween... But the lazy me appears again. So, I wasn't able to write here.
Anyways, like what i said a while ago. SOMETHING'S BOTHERING ME and it makes me think and think and think of it all over again. Am I really UNLUCKY in Love or all the guys i loved is NOT FOR ME because God hasn't found the one for me yet?
I asked this question to myself many times.
mmm, It made me think of I'm UNLUCKY in LOVE because every time i fall for a guy, that guy already like or love someone else and then they won't fall for me.I always fall for the wrong one, wrong timing. It really hurts but all i really need to do is to ACCEPT it but to be honest i'm tired of accepting the truth and "truth hurts".
They said "wait for the right time and don't find love, let love find you" but the question is WHEN? you know, I have a short patience. I also want to experience what most of all the people experience... and that is to be love by the person you love but I'm also thinking that they're right maybe i should just wait for the right time and have a long patience. Maybe those guys i fall for are not really meant for me. Maybe God hasn't found the one for me yet, the one that's better to all the guys i loved and besides i'm still young. I don't need to be in a hurry. There's no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen. In the right time, with the right person, for the best reason.
but you know, this just sucks ! it keeps on bothering me. It keeps me think of it. It keeps me ask myself that question. It makes me STRESS. I am really a wimpy girl when it comes to LOVE and i HATE it. ugh !
anyways, 2nd semester is really coming very soon and i like it. I read a lot of status like "I'll do better this 2nd semester" "Be ready 2nd semester" blah blah blah.
It makes me feel nervous and scared but i know i can do this, i can pass 2nd semester and for the coming years and semesters to come for with God always, nothing is impossible :)) and maybe i should just keep my attention and focus to my studies and not to my Love life. I know it will come. Love will finally found me someday. :D
-k2i6e6.kaimen-
Anyways, like what i said a while ago. SOMETHING'S BOTHERING ME and it makes me think and think and think of it all over again. Am I really UNLUCKY in Love or all the guys i loved is NOT FOR ME because God hasn't found the one for me yet?
I asked this question to myself many times.
mmm, It made me think of I'm UNLUCKY in LOVE because every time i fall for a guy, that guy already like or love someone else and then they won't fall for me.I always fall for the wrong one, wrong timing. It really hurts but all i really need to do is to ACCEPT it but to be honest i'm tired of accepting the truth and "truth hurts".
They said "wait for the right time and don't find love, let love find you" but the question is WHEN? you know, I have a short patience. I also want to experience what most of all the people experience... and that is to be love by the person you love but I'm also thinking that they're right maybe i should just wait for the right time and have a long patience. Maybe those guys i fall for are not really meant for me. Maybe God hasn't found the one for me yet, the one that's better to all the guys i loved and besides i'm still young. I don't need to be in a hurry. There's no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen. In the right time, with the right person, for the best reason.
but you know, this just sucks ! it keeps on bothering me. It keeps me think of it. It keeps me ask myself that question. It makes me STRESS. I am really a wimpy girl when it comes to LOVE and i HATE it. ugh !
anyways, 2nd semester is really coming very soon and i like it. I read a lot of status like "I'll do better this 2nd semester" "Be ready 2nd semester" blah blah blah.
It makes me feel nervous and scared but i know i can do this, i can pass 2nd semester and for the coming years and semesters to come for with God always, nothing is impossible :)) and maybe i should just keep my attention and focus to my studies and not to my Love life. I know it will come. Love will finally found me someday. :D
-k2i6e6.kaimen-
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